About Simina Milesi

Get to know your new relationship and life coach.

Hi, my name is Simina

They say that therapists get better with age. Considering I started as a child trying to figure out what was going on in my family, I'm pretty good at it!

I had the luck and the curse of growing up in an unhappy family.

In many ways, my interest in human nature stemmed from trying to understand my angry mother and the unhappiness in my family and make sense of who I was and what was going on around me.

I found many of the answers by pursuing a Master’s Degree in Psychoanalysis and Deconstruction, a Postgraduate Degree in Psychotherapy and Counseling and coaching programmes.

I couldn’t do what I do and be where I am without having been in therapy myself. Taking stock of my life and doing my own work is a strength that I bring when coaching my clients.

The greatest answer I took away from both my personal and professional experience that I now infuse into coaching is this:

Everything we are and everything we do comes down to the relationship with ourselves. Which then informs our relationships with others. Which finally builds the foundation for a happy and vibrant life.

21st Century Coaching

For 21st Century People and Their Problems Based on the Teachings of 21st Century Leaders in Personal and Relational Development

Most of us are trying to navigate 21st century life and relationships with outdated 20th century skills. Alongside a solid academic foundation and practical experience, these are some of the brilliant 21st century teachers whose methods will inspire our coaching experience together:

01

I have learned a tremendous amount about the devastating effects of narcissism on others from the incredibly knowledgeable Eleanor Payson.

02

Gabor Mate’s writings and professional courses on trauma deepened my understanding of its effect on the mind, body and heart.

03

Diane Poole Heller taught me how to help clients develop stronger and more secure attachment styles resulting in more joyful and happier adult relationships.

04

I have had the honour to take certification courses and be personally taught and mentored in matters of the heart and relationships by Terry Real (with whom I remain in continuous education) and Katherine Woodward Thomas.

05

Esther Perel’s wisdom on modern relationships informs a lot of my work with couples. Like Esther, I have an accent, too!

06

In 2018 while in New York I became a “Spirit Junkie” and Gabby Bernstein fan. I love nothing more than meditating with Gabby and, thanks to her, I feel that the universe always has my back.

07

It’s through Gabby Bernstein that I met Christine Hassler who coached me and encouraged me to put my own dreams into action by starting this coaching business while continuing to work in the City.

My Coaching Principles

  
     My work, being trained both as a psychotherapist and as a coach, is deeply rooted in five psychological principles.

This is the most significant principle because success in today’s world so often depends on our ability to establish good relationships. The relationship with ourselves impacts our ability to create happy, healthy love with others. Which then has an impact on our work, and whether or not we feel empowered to achieve our aspirations. While the 20th century introduced millions to personal development, the 21st century has evolved to focus on relational development. Therefore, I believe in helping you develop relational skills essential to happiness at home, success in your career, and coping with life’s adversities.
To change harmful dysfunctional or self-defeating behaviours and painful feelings, we need to change our beliefs. Our thoughts and beliefs determine and often limit how we feel, what we do, and what we think is possible. However, I am more than a mindset coach. I help you identify and replace negative beliefs with beliefs that serve and support your growth but also help you deal with unpleasant emotions, connect with your body wisdom and learn to listen to your intuition.
Churchill’s belief was that our worst experiences can be our teachers and the catalyst for extraordinary transformation and change will be woven into our coaching experience together. Healing, fulfillment and freedom come from our ability to choose how we respond to whatever life brings us. We derive meaning and purpose from all our experiences, and in particular, from our suffering.
Transformation is the domain of the future, while healing is the domain of the past; that is why we start by creating a powerful vision of the future you want to create while working on processing and reframing painful past adversities. We flourish when we learn that we have the ability to create the meaning and direction of our lives and practice in the present the skills and capacities required to fulfil that vision while clearing past traumas and hurts.
And last but not least, the importance of unconditional positive self-regard. Much of our suffering stems from our misconception that we are not lovable, that we can't be genuinely loved and that if we are to earn others’ acceptance and approval we must deny or hide our true selves. In my work, I strive to extend unconditional love to my clients and to guide them to discover how they can become free when they stop wearing masks and fulfilling the roles and expectations their parents, culture or society have assigned them, and start unconditionally loving and accepting themselves.

When I’m Not
Coaching I Enjoy…

➤ Living a healthy lifestyle. I particularly love trampoline cardio on my Bellicon rebounder, Pilates and barre.

➤ David Attenborough and his wonderful programmes on nature and wildlife. They are the vitamins my soul needs.

➤ All the cultural delights that the city of London offers from arts to food, fashion and so much more.

➤ Dreaming about when I can have a dog again. If you have a naughty pooch who has chewed all your furniture, is terrorising your family, and running your life, I have advice to impart on that too!